Our 2010 Christmas Letter

We shared this letter with our immediate family this year but we wanted to share it with you all. Merry Christmas!

Dear Friends and Family,

            This is really the first year we have sat down to write a letter to let you know about our lives. I hope this letter finds you all well and anticipating the joys of this season. What can I say; our lives have seen so much this past year. This has truly been the most difficult year we have ever been through. I want to start by thanking all of you who have supported us through the past year’s events. We have been blessed with so much love and support that it truly is overwhelming and impossible to thank everyone for all the help they have given us.

            Our struggles really began over a year ago as Gladys and I began thinking about having a third child. We prayed and felt that children truly are a blessing from the Lord and to have a bag full of quivers (children) is a sign of God’s love and trust towards us. Despite what the world, and sadly many Christians believe, a home full of children is a blessing and not a burden. So we decided to try and have a baby and in typical Lasley/Araujo style it did not take long. We were celebrating the new life growing in Gladys and anticipating the baby’s arrival. Unfortunately, because the world is not as it should be, the life inside of Gladys would not survive and after 8 weeks of having the privilege of carrying God’s creation we miscarried. I buried that baby in our backyard by our garden because I just didn’t know what else to do. I go back there occasionally and look at the spot and think about my lost child; little did I know then that it would be two children before this year ended.

            This year began with Gladys getting pregnant in January as we decided to try again. We waited until after the first few months to really share the news with friends and family as we did not want to break Nate and Sammy’s hearts again if the baby miscarried. When we told Nate about the first miscarriage he literally dropped into our laps and balled his little eyes out. It was really difficult to deal with and I did not want to have to go through that again. But I have discovered that we are not in control, we really are not in control of life. God is the giver and all life is in His hands. Anyway, we told everyone and we told the boys. We had many decisions to make regarding the new birth. We prayed and read and became probably the most educated parents we know on the birth process and all the various options that exist for giving birth. We studied and studied and prayed and prayed and through it all we settled on a plan and we know that God led us in that direction.

            We had a wonderfully healthy baby by all medical standards. We had all of the ultrasounds; heart monitoring and baby check ups that the average pregnant women have. We had one of the best birth teams anybody could have and we had from every appearance the best pregnancy and healthiest baby we ever had. Gladys even took care of herself better than she ever had. She did not gain near as much weight and she ate much healthier. We did everything humanly possible to love this child into the world. Everything seemed great and God was blessing us in so many ways. Gladys had all sorts of new baby stuff practically given to us through craigslist. We got a free crib, video monitors, and a beautiful pack-n-play practically given to us. God even blessed me with a side job teaching as an adjunct for a nearby university that paid for us to get away to the beach in Florida for a 5 day vacation to celebrate our new arrival and our 10 year anniversary.

            There were a couple of things that played out this year that looking back were definite signs of God working because He knew what was coming. Sometime in January I was asked to lead a mission trip to Mexico for our church and I was so excited about it. However, the timing of it was going to be tricky as we would be having a baby late in October and the trip was set to take place in the middle of November. Gladys and I talked and we both thought it would be ok to plan the trip as long as the church knew that the timing might not work and they may need to find a last minute leader for the trip if for some reason the baby was late and I couldn’t make it. The mission committee in their wisdom and their listening to God decided that it would be best to just go ahead with another leader rather than take that chance on me not making it. I was disappointed but I totally understood that decision and looking back God was definitely in control and He knew I would not make that trip. The other thing that happened was that my band had too many events scheduled in October and November. Gladys and I tend to disagree sometimes about my hobby/ministry because I tend to be selfish about what I want and not thinking about the needs of my family. I realized that I had overcommitted and this has happened before. I had to back out of those events and that usually makes a band look pretty bad, but everything worked out for the events we cancelled. No one was upset with us and other things took place that would have cancelled some of those events anyway.

            I guess I am rambling but I sense that God was preparing us because after Isabella came and then passed away I needed so much time to deal with her loss and my family needed me. God was in control. His ways are definitely not my ways and I have a hard time understanding why instead of orchestrating my life around the death of our daughter he could have just orchestrated our daughter to live. But by His decisions that was not what was in store for us.

            Gladys’ labor was beautiful. She was so strong and Isabella again appeared to be very strong by all human wisdom. Her heart endured intense contractions and never really gave us a sign that she had a cord wrapped around her neck 6 times. We really did not know there was any trouble until the moment she entered the world and we saw what had happened. Those images will haunt me forever, images of the cord, her lifeless, limp body and the professionals trying to administer CPR and nose suctioning on such a frail little person. Gladys and I, after realizing that we needed God to give her breath, began praying and praying for her. We wailed and prayed for what felt like an eternity until she was whisked away by the medical people to try and give her life. But it was not to be. She never did take that first breath and we never saw her wiggle and cry out those wonderful newborn cries.

            I am sorry if this letter is so sad and hard to read. But this is what our year has been, this is who we are. We are the parents of two boys on earth and two babies in heaven. They will never be with us here but we will go to them. Many of you never got to hear our story from us and frankly it is too hard to repeat over and over again, so I wanted to share our story with you. We had many joys those 9 months of feeling Isabella, hearing her beautiful heart and seeing her through ultrasounds. We have many beautiful pictures of her after she was born and the time we had with her in the hospital. We have many blessings, but sometimes it is hard to see those through the grief. We love you all and we know you have shared in our grief. We pray that those of you who do not know our Savior will meet Him and come to know Him as we have for He truly is the only One getting us through this time. For those of you that know Him, cling to Him even more for He is our ever present help in times of trouble. This may be a great upcoming year for you but never neglect those things that are most important – your friends, your spouse and children, your family and most of all the Savior Jesus Christ. I wrote a song a few years ago “Hold on to the memories, they fade so fast, there’s pain in these broken dreams, but it’s going to pass.” I never knew how prophetic that would be for us. Cherish the blessings you have, cherish the little things with your family because it all does pass one day. May you find the peace that passes all understanding when you face tragedies in the living years. God Bless!

                                                                                   Chris, Gladys, Nate and Sammy

“Mentioning my child’s name may make me cry. Not mentioning my child’s name will break my heart.” – Unknown